Jesus Freaks

Sometimes I feel as though God should have chosen someone else; that I'm not strong enough to endure through the things that He's called me to do. That somehow He's made a mistake and I can't possibly be called to the middle of India. Sometimes I feel that it's just all too overwhelming and I have a great life here. Sometimes I think that there must be someone better suited to go into the depths of India to preach the Gospel.

"For He knows how weak we are; He remembers we are only dust." Psalm 103:14 I am reminded that it's true: I am not worthy, I am not fit for the task He's put ahead of me, and mostly I have been gifted with a gift which I do not deserve. But still God has chosen me; worth only as a spec of dust in His eyes, yet He's chosen me. He's chosen to work through me, to strengthen me, to give me a worth, to give me boldness in His name, and most importantly He's done what cost Him His son for me; He's given me eternity.

I'm leaving to India in two days. These thoughts ring in my mind over and over again. I've been truly blessed. God's given me a purpose and a desire to follow Him. He will be the one strengthening me and encouraging me in India. His mighty works will be displayed throughout India and I have the privilege of going along the ride with Him. And though there is no way that I'd be able to do this myself I have love of my life: my savior going alongside me.

I'm currently reading Jesus Freaks, a book about martyrs; a book about thousands of men, women and children giving their lives for the furtherance of the Gospel; a book about people that were burned at the stake, people who's fingernails got pulled off one by one, of people who's families were getting killed in front of their faces; a book where through all these circumstances these people prayed for their killers that they'd come to know Christ, and with their final breath glorified Jesus' name on high and praised Him for their sufferings.

I sit here today praying for just this; boldness to preach the Gospel with reverence and adoration; strength to endure whatever He puts before me; and when it comes time to choose Jesus or life I pray that with complete confidence that I will choose Jesus Christ.

"Sin loses its power over us when we lay our lives down for Christ--because our eyes are on Jesus."

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